holy effin’ s&*t.

So. There are lots of people that mock The Tweety (as Craig Ferguson — follow him @CraigyFerg — calls Twitter), but I’ve gotten so much out of it.  I’ve made friends, learned about great deals, I’ve found viral video fun, I’ve better learned about my city and so much more.  Well, enter today.  I found out about this thing where I can take this bootcamp for free at Total Results Training.  Umm, what?  One of the things that’s been totally dogging me is the fact that I’m 20-40 pounds overweight.  I put the range because I would be effin’ unstoppable at 120.  Seriously.  Watch out, people.  Fucking watch out.

Okay. I’m trying not to swear when I’m blogging about this since there’s a company involved, but as Craig Ferguson says (yes, I’m completely in love with this man — seriously, NOT a stalker, okay!?), “There are just times when only a cuss word will do.”  So, yeah, if/WHEN I’m 120 pounds — be careful.  I’m going to be so kick ass it’s going to be amazing.

Is it sad that I put so much stock in how I look?  I’m sorry that I live in these times where I think that my value/worth will increase by having a better looking body.  But let’s get down to brass tacks — better thoughts about it.  I’ll look better, so I’ll feel better.  I’ll weigh less, so I’ll feel better.  I’ll be in better shape, so I’ll feel better.  I’ll most likely be eating much better, so I’ll feel better.  Right? Right.  So it can’t be a bad thing.

But one of the things that has gotten me so depressed about the current state of affairs IS how out of shape I am and how much I hate the current state of affairs, so I’m not going to lie about how scary this prospect is.  I’m afraid I’m going to look like a fool and seem stupid and be the only one falling terribly behind and huffing and puffing like a big radish — an indiscriminate root vegetable.  It’s a long story there, but still.

Anyway, I’m blogging about it … so I’m back to the Smussyolay, and I’m back to … whatever is coming.  Bring it.  Bring it.  But not *too* hard.


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