nothing says, i’m sorry you lost your loved one in a tsunami like an e-card.
my sister sent me an e-card for valentine’s day, and i actually thought it was kind of sweet. besides the really bad electronic music that normally accompanies them that burst out of the computer at a terribly loud volume with no warning, this one was thoughtful and an unexpected surprise.
my sister and i have never been close*, and this was an appropriate gesture, i thought. a way to say: hey, i’m thinking of you. i went out of my way to pick out a little token and personalize it and say — i’m thinking about you today. i thought that was nice. at least, it made me have a little warm fuzzy. which, i think would be the intent of the e-card.
but, as i was seeing how i could appropriately reciprocate without joining ‘american greetings dot com’ or paying for their service, i saw an e-card for ‘tsunami relief’ or tsunami sympathies or something.
umm? no. this e-card fad/trend/frenzy is NOT appropriate for someone who has lost someone in a tsunami. well, on that note, i don’t really think it’s appropriate for death at all. a colorful picture, some bad synthesized computer music. no. the e-card is not a good replacement for showing up at someone’s wake and laying a hand on a shoulder or giving a hug.
*when you are 18 months apart, i think you are either bound to be super friends, or the rolling around in the middle of the supermarket dairy aisle brawling type. we were the latter. we were 16 and 14 1/2. i was pushing the cart and had accidentally hit the back of her ankle, well, more technically, her achilles heel. it WAS an accident. i wasn’t paying attention. since this was painful, she flew into a typical jenny rage. i was backing up, hands up — it was an accident! but to no avail. she came at me… when i could sense that it was going to be an all out attack, i went into offense mode. sliding my foot across in a sweeping motion, i went for her leg. this worked well, and i was able to get her on the floor. i’m no boxer, but i can stand a chance in the wrestling world. we were going at it for a bit between the cold aisle where all the orange juice, cheese, milk and sour cream were showcased, my mom being quite ineffectual in stopping the whole scene when a man from our church came up and made some wry comment about having teenage girls. (my mom was church secretary. needless to say, she was mortified.) we knew the shit was really hitting the fan then, so we stopped and got off the floor. the tipping point had also arrived when we then became co-conspirators in laughter, because we realized the ridiculousness of the situation being caught by a stranger. i don’t remember a lot of this as myself, it seems like something from a movie, something i watch from outside of my body.
sometimes, i think *i* have lived ‘running with scissors.’